oblivi0s:

When you and you’re friend are trying to do something cool to impress someone and they fuck up

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(Source: onlydillon, via 95laughingtacos)

super-who-locked-in:

sarahseemssilly:

theycallmethemoose:

everkings:

gildatheplant:

pragtastic:

fifty-shades-of-gandalf-the-grey:

leomoriat:

poesdaughter:

Or, y’know, that thing called “Passover.”

Or the whole thing with Noah’s Ark where he killed off everything in the world except Noah and his family, and two of every animal. Y’know, no big deal. Just millions of people.

90% of the Old Testament is about God killing people in temper tantrums

Are we not going to mention Jesus?

Nailed it.

*wheeze* 

Oh my god.

Nailed it.

Hahaha oh dear
aduhm:

he fuck that goat

andrewbelami:

when ur with family

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when ur with bae

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(via socialtesparks)

clisneyprincess:

see that girl you just called a bitch? she didn’t hear you say it louder

(Source: prlncest, via isawthew0lf)

juliencortes:

how i survived high school.